6TO8WEEKS.MP3
Adam Sandler: I'm so sorry
I left you at the hospital. I called a phone sex line. I
called a phone sex line before I met you, and four blonde
brothers came after me and they hurt you, and I'm sorry. And then
I had to leave again because I wanted to make sure you never got hurt
again. And, and I have a lot of pudding, and in 6 to 8 weeks it can
be redeemed. So if you could just give me that much time I think I
could get enough mileage to go with you wherever you have to go if
you have to travel for your work because I don't ever want to be anywhere
without you. So, could you just let me redeem the mileage?
Emily Watson: You left me at the hospital.
Adam Sandler:
I'm sorry.
Emily Watson: You can't do that.
Adam
Sandler: OK. If you just give me 6 to 8 weeks I can redeem the mileage,
and I can go with you wherever you have to travel.
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AREYOUGAY.MP3
Sister: Remember when we used to call you gayboy and you'd get all
mad?
Adam Sandler: What's
that?
Sister: We'd
call you gayboy. Remember? You'd be fine and then we'd call you gayboy
and you'd just freak out!
Sister:
We would call you gay; and you got so mad that you threw the hammer
through the sliding glass door. You remember.
Adam
Sandler: I
don't remember that.
Sister: Yes you do, we'd call you gayboy and you got so mad.
Are you gay now?
Adam
Sandler: I
don't know.
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CHAT.MP3
Adam Sandler: This is Barry.
Sister: Hey it's me, what are you doing?
Adam Sandler:
I have some customers, I can't really chat right now.
Sister: Chat? Did you just say chat? You just f-ing said chat, that's
so, what are you now? Chat.
I'm just calling to make sure that you show up to this party tonight.
Adam Sandler:
Oh yes, I will be there.
Sister: OK fine then. You get to go back to chatting with your precious
customers you f-ing phony, chatty piece of sh*t.
Adam
Sandler: OK. All right. Thank you.
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CRYINGPROBLEM.MP3
Adam Sandler:
I didn't ask for a shrink,
that must've been somebody else. Also, that pudding isn't mine. Also,
I'm wearing a suit today because I had a very important meeting this
morning, and I don't have a crying problem.
Emily Watson: OK.
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DEMONSTRATE.MP3
- (Adam Sandler) - Been
working on this and we have a non-breakable handle finally. Let me
demonstrate for you. (handle breaks) OK.
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DENTIST.MP3
Adam Sandler: I wanted
to ask you something because you're a doctor right.
Brother-in-law: Yeah.
Adam Sandler:
I don't like myself sometimes, can you help me?
Brother-in-law: Barry, I'm a dentist.
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GLASSDOORS.MP3
- Glass doors being broken
Sister: What the F is your problem?!
Sister:
F-ing retard Barry!!!
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KNOWWHEREYOULIVE.MP3
- Where the F are you going? We know where you live!
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MUSTBEWEIRD.MP3
Emily Watson: Must be weird for you to have so many sisters.
Adam Sandler:
No, not at all, it's
very nice.
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